Category Archives: positive mindset

How to Create Clarity in a Busy Mind in 15 minutes

 

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How to Create Clarity in a Busy Mind in 15 Minutes

I don’t know about you but the beginning of the year is a busy brain season for me. I’ve been creating goals, working on new ideas and doing lots of training. My brain’s been on overdrive, with so much that I want to do this year! I’m going to share my own busy mind experiences with you and my top tips for clearing mind clutter.

Thinking Ahead 

Our brains can easily go into overdrive when we start acting on our goals and it’s tough keeping all that information in our heads. I wrote about planning the year ahead in this post:  How to Write Awesome 2019 Goals Without Feeling Overwhelmed

  • I’m sharing my social media plan printable with you. It’s great for anyone who wants to limit time on social media, but I did create it with Chronic Bloggers in mind. If you want productivity over busyness, grab it at the end of this post ⬇️

My problem with plans, is that I want to just crack on and forget I’ve got brain disease! I’ve always had a passion for planning, but it doesn’t always go to plan. I go full-on Laura mode, with ideas taking over every tiny bit of headspace left I have left. The bits not backlogged with blood and CSF. Ewww, sorry for that image. Wondering what’s CSF? ➡️ What is Idiopathic Intracranial Hypertension/IIH?

I’ve not planned properly, since having left teaching, but this year I got busy creating planning grids for my blog, email and business strategies. I hadn’t planned to make them, which messed up my plans. 🤔 I was trying to do it all, forgetting to review and adapt and I gave that anxiety monster a VIP pass! As I practise grounding strategies often, I was able to calm my busy mind quickly and worked on strategies for organising my thoughts.

Write things down to make sense of your thoughts

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To Do Notes are ok if they have some structure to them

 

If your brain’s overworked, get a pen and some paper and write your thoughts down. I don’t think ‘to do’ lists, are a productive way to form clear ideas from jumbled thoughts. They’re great for quick reminders, but not so great for bigger issues. So what could you use instead? Here are my top tips for creating clarity in a busy mind.

I normally use a diary but this year I decided to try a more structured planner.  Structure is important for focusing  your thoughts, whichever format is for you.

 

 

 

I brought my planner from StarCreationsCo on Etsy   It’s great because:

  • It has a yearly and monthly calendar for planning ahead ✅
  • it has a space for me to write my goals ✅ (I want those everywhere)
  • It has a monthly page of squares for bullet journaling, so I can test the idea ✅
  • It has space to plan, reflect and add your most important jobs ✅
  • Most of all it’s really pretty and I can add stickers and washi tape ✅

You can see where I’ve rubbed out where I’ve planned too much here. No filter…

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My planner has a week to view and is formatted to helps me organise my thoughts on paper

Reflection 

At the end of each day I always write 3 positive things which happened that day. There’s not quite enough space in the planner. So I’m using a gorgeous diary covered in recycled vintage Korean fabric from my friend’s lovely Etsy shop – The Vintage Bookworm. I write:

  • I’m Happy because…
  •  I’m Grateful for…
  • I’m Proud of…

It’s so important to reflect on each day, each week, each month and each year to have a success with positive mindset! Take time to celebrate your successes, big or small. Reward yourself with a pamper, a bubble bath or just a pat on the back. These rewards trigger the pleasure centres of our brain and make us want more positivity.

 

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An overly busy mind leads to overwhelm

An Overloaded Mind

When things get too much and start to become a mess in my head, I create head space by getting my ideas down on paper or notes on my phone. I’ve been creating structure so I can be productive and focused. I’ve made a social media plan a free printable for you ⬇️

 

 

My anxiety is usually from having an overloaded mind and this still gets the better of me sometimes. Structuring my thoughts and writing them down always calms my mind. I’m sharing the strategies I’ve built up over time with you and some I found on these sites;

Anxiety Canada.com  and Anxieties.com

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How To Create Clarity In A Busy Mind In 15 Minutes

 

Top Tips for Creating Clarity in a Busy Mind in just 15 Minutes

 

When One Big Problem is Bothering You

  1. Set a 15 minute timer and free write – This is a cathartic activity and works best with a real pen and paper so that you can let your thoughts spill onto the paper; clearing your mind clutter. If you avoid doing this your problem will get just bigger in your head. If you write it down, it may not seem as big a problem as you thought!
  2. Speak to someone you trust – Find someone you know is a good listener, such as your partner or good friend. Set ground rules before you start and be clear that you’ll only spend 15 minutes talking about this. Going over and over the problem will create more negativity and isn’t good for your headspace. Say it, listen and move on.
  3. Act on your negative feelings, before it becomes a problem – Are you feeling Stressed, Nervous, Frustrated or Anxious? Set a 10 minute timer and use this feeling to turn the problem into a question – e.g. Why am I anxious about going to the doctors? Then quickly list the reasons that come up. Write your answer down using positive language i.e ‘I can stop feeling anxious by writing my questions’.
  4. Be solution focused
  • Using a 3 minute egg timer – write down your problem. You can create a mind map or flow chart if visuals help you.
  • Turn over the timer – write down your negative feelings about this problem. You may have many or just one. Write them as one main sentence about why you feel that way e.g. I feel really nervous about this job interview.
  • Turn over the timer – write down what’s stopping you solve this e.g. I’m nervous because last time I forgot to say…! Be specific and don’t make assumptions.
  • Turn over the timer – think about your ideal solution or a 1st step. Write this down e.g. I’m going to make notes on flash cards so I remember to say…

Some problems will need more than 15 minutes to solve completely, but these strategies can be adapted. If you ignore these big problems they’ll start to affect your health.

How to Cope with an Overactive Mind in 15 Minutes 

  • Exercise daily – Daily you say? Yes, daily! I don’t mean a full on work out, we’re talking about 15 minutes here! You could: Take a 15 minute walk round the park, do 15 minutes of reps/sit ups etc or try a 15 minute morning yoga stretch. Exercise helps clear your mind and releases serotonin, which makes you feel good! Even from bed I do bed yoga (Yep, it’s a thing) most days. *Please make sure to check with you Doctor before starting any new exercise routine.
  • Set a daily worry/thinking time – This one might sound strange, but you can retrain your brain by setting a regular time to sit quietly for 15 minutes and let those thoughts free. This only works if you’re able to distract yourself the rest of the day as we don’t want to lose you down that rabbit hole before you get to that time.
  • Carry a little notebook and Pen – This one might seem obvious, but it’s a must. I tend to use my phone’s notes, it just needs to be portable. Offload your thoughts quickly before they get too heavy. If you’re a night worrier then keep one next to your bed too. Just set a timer for 15 minutes.
  • Meditate regularly – Many of us struggle to fit this into our lives or think it’s too hard. I’ve used meditation daily since becoming ill as it’s known for creating calm. At first work on controlling your breathing and let your thoughts come to mind. Then let them go by focusing back on your breathing. A guided meditation will talk you through this process and there are loads available for free on YouTube or apps, such as Insight Timer. This is one of the top 5 things that help me stay positive. I’ve written more on this here. These are both great guided meditations for beginners.
  • The Honest Guys Body Scan Guided Meditation
  • Jason Stephenson Beginners Guided Meditation
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Use Meditation to focus and create space for your thoughts, before letting them go.
  • Turn negatives into a positives  – Set a 15 minute timer and grab a piece of paper. Draw a vertical line half way and write everything busying your mind. Then look at each one separately and try to turn it into a positive statement. E.g I’m not sleeping well, I’m so tired  | I will go to bed early and sleep will happen. This redirects your thoughts and establishes positive language, which helps you to remain focused and find solutions quickly.
  • Use Affirmations for daily positive thoughts – I use these to focus on the big dreams, I dare to dream. They help keep me positive even on the worst days when pain and/or anxiety are off the charts! Affirmations are positive statements or intentions that tell your brain___ is totally going to happen! Using these daily can help you become who you dream of being! I’ve used them successfully for three brain and skull surgeries 😵. If you still want to be rid of negativity, I can help. I’ve created a set of affirmations for my Etsy shop and you can get your hands on a free sample today. See details below ⬇️
  • Use a strategy to reduce the time you spend on Social Media – Let’s face it, we can’t get away from social media and as a blogger you need it. I take a total break or limit the number of sites I’m on when I need to rest. I recommend using an app to schedule your content ahead. You can be more productive by planning in bulk so that you can focus on engagement for 15 minutes before you post. If this is your style then please download my free social media planner printable below ⬇️. I created it for Chronic Illness bloggers, but it can be adapted for anyone.

Social Media Planner for Chronic Bloggers

Social Media Planner for Chronic Illness Bloggers using 15 minutes Engagement time before posting

In Conclusion 

Please take away the most important message from this – You need to write your thoughts down to make sense of what you’re stewing over. Set up regular habits to kickstart a cycle of positive thinking, reflection and reward. It’s really worth taking 15 minutes to convert your thoughts into beautiful ideas or solutions and it’s just as important to look after your brain as the rest of your body! Try out some of these ideas to find what works for you!

I’d love to hear from you if you try any of these out or want to share ideas that help you. Sharing is caring and with mental health, we need to keep an ongoing conversation!

Before you go…

My Etsy shop The Paprika Jewellery aims to support positive thinking by creating designs from positive themes. Jewellery & Accessories made from the soul, for the soul.

Want to be the first to know what’s coming and get your hands on exclusive deals? Grab a 15% coupon code for your next purchase in my Etsy shop and a free printable sample of my ‘Positive Affirmations’ by signing up to my occasionally regular newsletter today!

Click here to subscribe and grab your freebies! img_2933

Chronic Illness Bloggers

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5 Morning Affirmations To Guarantee A Successful Day!

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5 Morning Affirmations To Guarantee A Successful Day

Hey there, are you someone who needs a bit of a boost in your day?

Maybe you’re feeling like you’re missing the mark at work, that your relationship’s doomed, that you’re useless because you’re chronically ill or that you’re just having disastrous days.

job12-280-chim-00918If you’re a negative thinker or a self-sabotager and the life you want seems a long way off, then this post’s for you! I’ve got tips for making positive changes by just spending a few minutes a day on affirmations. There’s even science to back that up! So now with your morning coffee you can start your day the positive way!

 

What are Affirmations?

Maybe you’ve heard of Affirmations but think they sound sappy or too out there. Maybe you don’t think they’d help as you’re ok, just not as successful as you’d hoped. Stick with me and I’ll show you how affirmations help you build a positive mindset.

Before I start you off on your journey to a successful day, you need to know what the deal is. I first heard of Affirmations about 15 months ago and now spend a few minutes each day on them. I think much more positively now and want everybody to realise they can find positive in every day. Here are a few simple tips to help you!

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Set Positive Intentions

 

Affirmations help you set an intention for that day (or however long you need it for), starting with ‘I am’ for example. They’re a great tool for helping you think more positively and if used regularly, each day will be more positive! OK, so your thoughts won’t change overnight, but I can assure you that they’ll work if you stick with it.

 

 

You use something you want to feel, do or happen and write it as though it’s already happening. So instead of ‘I want to feel loved and happy’. Your affirmation says ‘I choose love and happiness’.

You may have to do a little bit of work to crack the code at first, but you’ll soon be starting your day the positive way. So if you’re feeling low or a bit meh; then this is such a simple way to structure your thoughts and create a positive loop:

positive thought = positive actions = self-worth = positive thought and so on.

How Affirmations Work

For an affirmation to work fully, you need to trick your brain. A bit like changing the TV remote’s batteries, you need to put negative and positive in the right place. Instead of matching them to a symbol, you need to rewire your thinking, especially if you’re a Negative Nelly!

To rewire your brain, you have to make Positive Polly drown out Negative Nelly. To do that, you need to say the affirmation out loud, more than once! Just like exercise to improve our physical health is repetitive, any exercise to improve our mental health needs to be repetitive. Practise makes Positive!

To Create this positive repetition, you could write them in your journal/diary, put them on a memo board/fridge or record them using a voice memo app and listen to them wherever you are. I use all 3 of these for maximum impact!

Each time you create these positive responses from affirmations, your brain kicks in the reward mechanism. I won’t get too sciencey, but if you use affirmations about your most important values, your brain will soon begin to have positive reactions.

These positive reactions create a reward, such as increasing your self-worth. Once your brain gets a reward it will want more. You’ll start thinking and acting more positively. You’ll value yourself and feel a sense of purpose. You’ll want to look after yourself more and start creating more positive than negative in your life.

I want to start you on this journey, so read on and see how much it helped me and get yourself set the 5 affirmations to start your successful day.

**Disclaimer – this won’t happen overnight! You’ll have to put the work in!

My Journey with affirmations

One of my favourite affirmations is ‘I replace anger with compassion and understanding’. When I first picked it from my set of cards, I wasn’t having the best day. I was angry with myself about something (I’ve no idea what) and almost put it back in the pack!

When I say I was angry with myself, I really mean that I felt guilty about something I probably should have done. It’s always been a habit of mine, but when I was still  processing my chronic illness I felt like this a lot!

Anyway, I left it on display for a couple of days and as suggested, I read it often and would say it too myself in my head every so often, as I wasn’t cool with saying it out loud at first. I started to feel calmer soon after making that choice to keep that card.

I started to feel less frustration and guilt and began to feel more positive. As I stuck with it, I found those Negative Nelly feelings were getting drowned out by Positivity Polly.

The more positive I felt the more positive action I took with my self care, which led to more positive thinking. And so the cycle continued and I was hooked!

5 Morning Affirmations to Guarantee a Successful Day

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5 Morning Affirmations to Guarantee a Successful Day

So this is what you’re here for. If you’ve skimmed to get here then do make sure you know what you’re doing, you cheeky thing! I’ve made one for you and a blank one to put personalised affirmations in.

You can download these here: Morning Affirmations

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I am full of gratitude and inspiration affirmation
  1. I am full of gratitude and inspiration
  2. Today is a wonderful new day, full of success
  3. I am open to positive change
  4. Today I will share my knowledge with others
  5. My ideas are worthy of being shared
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Blank Affirmation design for personalised affirmations

These are simple affirmations for success and to use each morning to set you up for a great day. Why not have a go tomorrow morning and come back and tell me about it!

If you’d like access to more free affirmations, then just sign up for my news and exclusives emails, using the pop up form or the link below. 

Sign up today for your free printable Affirmations cards

References

https://www.louisehay.com/affirmations/

If you’re really into Science then this explains why affirmations work and what effects they have on the brain. How Self Affirmation affects the brain

 

Chronic Illness Bloggers

5 Meditation Myths Stopping You Relieve Hidden Stress

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5 Meditation Myths Stopping You Relieve Hidden Stress

Meditation Myths

Are misconceptions about meditation preventing you from relieving stress and pent up anger?  If you want to learn how to develop techniques to think more clearly and positively, then find out how meditation can aid better sleep and restfulness. Find out how releasing negative energy through Meditation can help you live a happier, healthier and more positive life. Please don’t run away – I know the M word is scary as, but if you’ve got any investment in reducing stress levels, then keep reading!

*DISCLAIMER – All thoughts are my own, backed up by genuine research. Please don’t confuse me for a Doctor or anyone educated in Meditation. I just like it a lot!

I think Meditation is one of those Marmite (American? read this) words. Either someone snores you to death talking about Om postures and staring at a candle for 3 hours or the tumbleweeds roll when you mention it. No one wants to talk about 3 hour candle watching, so if you’re a sceptic, stick with me; it doesn’t have to be this way people!

If you’re in the ‘love it’ camp, please read this to consider if you’re adding to these myths. If you’re in the ‘hate it’ camp, then please read this to learn why these myths are giving meditation such a bad image. The word ‘Meditation’ evokes feelings of confusion and disinterest, even in a world where you can’t move for talk of self care!

But before I dive into the myths, I’d like you to reflect on your character, consider your day ahead or the one just gone and remember what your big goals/dreams are.

Reflect

I wonder what goes on in your everyday life and what you wake up to each day. Do you fret over the frenzy or dread the drudgery of your day? Are you fashion frantic or gagging for the gym?  A vocal vegan or a loudmouthed lobbyist? Actually, don’t answer those last questions! My point is, whether you’re a Conscious Charlie or a Trendsetting Tara, you’re expected to live by rules created by someone you’ll never know.

Consider

24 hours a day, we have access to news, emails, social media, shopping, partying and more. We drive when we could easily walk and lose that feeling of holding a real book as we download them. We have the TV on late at night, affecting our sleep and eat microwave meals instead of cooking even a simple omelette.

Remember

I believe we’re losing the art of engaging with our world. Forgetting to create magical moments for our children, like those from our own childhoods. For me it’s cooking crumble with my Nana and hauling 20 books home from the library. What about you? Do you talk with your family about their days? Do you actively take baby steps towards your ideal life and focus on your family’s hopes and dreams?

As I sat with my youngest and taught him how to make apple crumble without a recipe, I realised our responsibility to pass down the simplicity of life: before technology. The smells, sounds, look, feel and taste matched my memories of Nana and I in the kitchen, I knew she’d be smiling down on us. This was the first cooking I’ve done for a long time, as I need help, and it was wonderful. It was such a calm, peaceful and gratifying activity.

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Hidden Stress Can Result In Pent up Anger

Hidden Stress

We must do what we love, but our zest for success can seep into every area of our lives. We go to sleep with our phones in unnatural light. We compare our lives to the ideal image filling our newsfeeds. These are the hidden stresses of our fast paced world and can only get worse.

Without knowing it, we’re under strain from overwhelm. With no warning, sneaky stress can creep up on us and invade. Read more about overwhelm on this blog post. We all need to find some head space, so that our brains don’t fry and our bodies don’t burn out.

Headspace

I’ve been thinking about the vast space in our noggins for a while, but then read this article and found that we’re using most of our brains most of the time, even whilst sleeping. “The brain is constantly making new connections and breaking old ones” so surely we need to do as much as we can, to keep our grey matter healthy.

This made me consider how much we can balance before we buckle and whether we have any control over what is going on in those active minds. I concluded that we need armour in case of a headspace invasion (I think I may have just revealed my secret geek 😲). This brings me back to Meditation! You thought I’d forgotten then, didn’t you? 🤔

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5 Meditation Myths Stopping You Relieve Hidden Stress

Meditation Myths

If your reaction to this heading is hostility, then maybe we should part ways here – but you’re always welcome back of course. However if you can bear facing your meditation anticipation, then these are the 5 main excuses used when that word gets mentioned:

1. I’ve done it before and still have the same problems, it just didn’t work!

2. I can’t be quiet for long enough to read this post, let alone silence my mind!

3. I don’t have any time for it, there’s just too much in my life already!

4. I don’t really need to do it, I’m fine as I am thanks!

5. I don’t do that sort of hippie nonsense, sitting with my legs crossed and all that!

All that negativity gives me the heebie-jeebies. Anyway, any of the above rsound familiar? I bet you’ve said at least one of those. You’re not alone, meditation is misunderstood, but remember that busy mind I’ve unmecically diagnosed? That’s you, that is (I’d love it if you got that reference)! You may think you’re fine but do you really have all your shizz together?

Let’s start myth busting and see if meditation is something you’d consider. Could you learn to create some head space? Do you want simple techniques to help calm you when anxiety strikes? Come this way and learn how to solve problems the easy way!

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The Typical Image of Someone Meditating

1. Ok, so maybe you tried it once or twice and it didn’t solve your bitchy boss problem, or *________ (insert problem here). There are have been heaps of studies about meditation solving all sorts of things – mental and physical things. So when life goes pear shaped, it’s easy to pin your hopes on something you’ve heard might solve it all. However, like most things in life, you can’t just try it once and be all ‘winner winner’! When has that worked for you? I bet you didn’t just take one antibiotic dose and lose that throat infection either, did you?

You have to practise, practise, practise. But first explore and find out what works for you. Yep, that sounds like loads of work but you’re likely to find one that suits you pretty quickly. I know within seconds if the voice is right for me; if not, I change it. Look for beginner guided meditations first. I’ve recommended some of my favourites at the end of this post ⬇️.

2. Now then fidget pants, close all the other tabs on your phone – Yep, thought as much. I bet you’re doing way too much. No wonder you can’t concentrate, you need to stop sometimes and chill. If you had to sit in silence, could you? I doubt it, but that’s not the point. The goal for meditation is to help you cope with life!

You don’t need to silence your mind to meditate. You’re not a Buddhist monk! (unless you are, then I wholly apologise for everything I’ve said). This whole malarkey has actually been researched! They found that people when asked to concentrate on something, say a candle, for 5 minutes, couldn’t. Then they were told to not think about that candle and let their mind wander for 5 minutes. Guess what? They all thought about that sweet candle. I bet you’re imagining a candle now! 😂 Let your mind roam free and you’ll calm it. Silencing the mind to mediate is a total myth!

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Meditation is Not About Silencing The Mind

3. No time for it? Well I’m going to blow your mind right now… I watched this awesome Ted Talk and found out that there’s a study published in the International Journal of Neuroscience about this time thing, I wasn’t expecting what the speaker told us. So, our biological age speeds up when stressed and meditating can reduce the rate we age at. e.g. If you start meditating daily on your 30th birthday and had a matching biological and chronological age (Science stuff), something awesome happens – on your 35th birthday you’d have the skin, sight, hearing, memory and sexual responsiveness (yes, I went there) of a 23 year old! Say again???

Crazy – but logically from this research, meditation is the one activity where you get back the time you put in! You can meditate for 1 minute or 10 hours! You can concentrate on that candle for hours or learn a quick breathing meditation to calm your mind in minutes. I use an affirmation such as ‘Everything is going to be okay’ when the anxiety monster bites me. Just as it starts to sink those teeth in, my muttered words start to become reality; I know it’s going to be👌🏻and I can relax. This has stopped me having a panic attack more than once! You can use these quickies anytime, anywhere; on the train, in the office or lying in the dark.

4. Alright, you’re fine are you? Be honest – it’s only you and me! Do you have a busy mind; ever worry over things; lose your rag with your kids or argue with your partner? If you just nodded, raised your hand (it’s ok, no-one’s watching –  unless you’re on that train) or accepted those may be a possibility; you might want to rethink your excuse. It sounds to me like you need some time out, headspace or coping strategies! In a day we have tens of thousands of thoughts, it’s highly unlikely that you really are just fine. Meditation Mindfulness is a great way to take some time to consider what you need and how to get it. I bet after a few weeks meditating, a loved one notices something – an normal argument topic, becomes something you let go of instead! 

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Meditation after Brain Surgery

Meditation in any form, has more restorative effects than sleep. It’s thought to release feel good hormones and free the tension that’s built up over a stressful day. In my case, my pain is often worse than when I gave birth to my 10lb 9oz son naturally (really)! 15 minutes of meditation will reduce that pain to a tight band feeling – I know, right? I even use it after brain surgery to help me cope with the pain and busyness of a hospital ward. Mediation is a very important part of my daily routine; it can reduce my pain and let me write to you!

5. Ok, some meditation is full on hippie (no offence – I love that myself). The four (some say 30+) types of meditation vary in that between and within each category.

  • Concentration meditations are tough – this is where you have one single point of focus, such as that flickering candle and try and clear your mind of everything else.
  • Contemplation meditations are beginner friendly – guided meditations, visualisation and affirmations. Your mind is active and your thoughts roam free.
  • Mantras or Chanting meditations are the typical image of meditation. This involves prayer beads and chanting ‘om Shanti om’ and is typical Buddhist prayer practice.
  • Transcendental meditations are about going beyond thought. They’re usually way out, using vibrations to take the brain from using beta waves to Delta wave (beyond conscious thought). But can be as simple as closing your eyes and focusing on your breathing and being in the present/now.

There are studies that say meditating can heal such and such, but honestly can a medical meditation trial work? The Ted Talk linked above, explains this much better than I can. But as a beginner, if you try sitting cross legged in the lotus position with palms up in ‘om’ pose and start chanting;  you’re setting yourself up to fail. You’ll feel like a drowning peacock with all your beautiful feathers ruined; losing the attention you crave!

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Meditation Myths Busted! Silencing Your Mind is Not Typical Meditation Practice

My point is made now, but these myths are holding people back from using simple tools and techniques to deal with stress, hidden or not, that would ease the impact on both their mental and physical health!  Whatever you felt about meditation before reading this, I hope I’ve made you think or at least chuckle – unless you’re a Buddhist Monk of course.

Meditation can be an amazing tool for calming your mind. So, I’ll just finish by saying this: Anyone aged 3 – 103 can meditate. We all experience stress in this age of fast paced living. You can stay calm along this busy path through life with simple meditation techniques. Don’t be swayed by the myths and don’t add to them! It really is easy to let meditation into your life.

Here are some links to my favourite beginner meditations if you want to give it a go. * These are not affiliate links, they’re just my recommended go to’s.

Guided Body Scan for Beginners By The Honest Guys

Back To Basics Meditation By Jason Stephenson

Easy Beach Visualisation and Breathing Meditation

3 Minute Breathing Exercise

Deepak Chokra 3 Minute Focus Meditation

I use this App which has access to loads of meditations at different levels of ability and the different types of meditation. Insight Timer

Do you have any questions about meditating?

Do you meditate or is it still not for you?

I’d love to hear your thoughts and feelings on this. Please pop any comments or questions below. I’m looking forward to hearing if you’re a lover or a hater! Peace my friends!

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How to Write Awesome 2019 Goals Without Feeling Overwhelmed!

It’s Goal Setting Time. So how can you do this effectively, with a positive mindset? Here are my Top Tips!

 

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Okay, I know there are heaps of blogs out there about planning your goals for 2019, but (and this is a BIG but), there aren’t many out there which give you tips, based on science, to help stop nasty overwhelm and anxiety come knocking.

So, if you’re likely to be run ragged over resolutions; inundated with intentions; in a tiz over targets or engulfed in a goal funk then you NEED to read this post! You can interrupt that cycle of overwhelm and anxiety triggers.

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Why Me? 

Well, I’ve been there year after year. I’d make resolutions that would be forgotten by the end of January and endless to do lists that grew overnight. That was just at home! At work I’d have pages of lists and plans for every second. But, my professional targets would be in a folder until a week before my progress review!

I spent years making lists about lists and overflowing lists of things going round in my head, often keeping me up at night. I’d get distracted and put off doing what would move me forwards and achieve my goals. But now I know how to keep on top of my to do lists and manage my busy brain so I don’t get overwhelmed! You can too!

When Change Was Needed

When I fell ill in January 2014, you can imagine there were no resolutions being made. My focus was all on the one thing that was out of my control – getting better [I’ll come back to that]! I made a conscious choice not to make resolutions the next year, as they’re just too broad for me. I’d put too much pressure on myself, over-thinking and having negative experiences as it felt unachievable!

When I started taking my own business more seriously, even though it was mainly a pain distractor and boredom buster, I still wanted to succeed so I joined a new Facebook group, run by a coach called Josie. I was really excited by what she was saying about living with less worry, especially learning about the science behind my feelings. It was just what I needed to hear! Now I’m going to share some of what Josie’s taught me with you! You can read about what she does here: Worry Free

I soon realised I was still trying to do too much, leaving me drained when my husband and 2 boys needed me. I ended up giving myself just 1 goal: ‘I Will Be Kind To Myself’! I learnt so much about myself, mostly, that my family come 1st – Always! I’ve worked with Josie on my goals for the last 3 years now and each time has been different. From her amazing live videos, small group conference calls and support.

This year I’ve used her brand new Goal Creator download and video, which I’ll tell you how to get for FREE at the end of the post….

How To Write Awesome Goals for 2019 without being overwhelmed! 

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The Big Review

One of THE most important parts of Goal Setting is looking back at what’s worked well for you in the past and what you could improve. It’s really important that you don’t skip this bit! Here I’ll share 2 exercises that might help you. Try it and see!

  • Look back at 3 of your biggest achievements and 3 experiences that didn’t go well (avoiding triggers). List what stands out on both occasions?
  • List all that went well for you in 2018. Do this quickly, without thinking too much. Is there anything from your goals that you didn’t achieve as you wanted to? Do you notice any patterns that could help with planning goals this year?

Finally, don’t worry if you didn’t achieve all of last years goals. You can be flexible.

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Life Choices

Before doing anything, take a moment to think about your needs. Are you thinking how to create what you want more of or less of in your life? Overwhelm occurs if you don’t create balance. This exercise from Josie’s 6 week goal setting course can really help you zoom in on your needs. She explains it in more detail, but have a go!

  1. Roles – family, worklife, hobbies and community/your tribe.
  2. Relationships – family, friends, loved ones and other positive interactions.
  3. Self Worth –  positive mindset/thoughts and how you value yourselfY

Priorities  

You may have a long list at this point. Now narrow it down to just 3 or 4 goals. Try rating these areas from 1 to 10.  This is based on an exercise from The Goal Creator.

  • Personal Growth
  • Emotional Well-being
  • Romance
  • Family & Friendships
  • Self Care
  • Hobbies and Fun
  • Career/Work
  • Money
  • Your own Environment
  • Health, Nutrition and Fitness

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Which of these score the lowest number? The lowest of these should help you prioritise 3 or 4 goals. What do you need more of? What do you need less of?

 

 

What Might Be Holding You Back

Jot down the 3 or 4 goals you’re thinking of. Now take a step back and think of what might be holding you back from achieving them? Have you got any fears or worries?

There could be a few reasons for this. Ask yourself these questions:

  • Is this goal out of your control? Remember when I said ‘Getting Better’ is my ideal goal, but I can only control some aspects of this. Yours could be ‘Becoming a Millionaire’. But things you can’t control at all, need to go. If you could control parts of it, then make the bit you can control your goal.
  • Is it jumbled in your mind? Is there too much going round in your head and you can’t work out what to focus on?  Too help, can you see how the goal you’re thinking of fits into your Roles, Relationships and/or Self Worth?
  • Is it too much to do? It’s quite possible that in your excitement, you’ve forgotten  these aren’t your long term goals. Realistically is it something you can do in under a year? If you don’t think so, then making this a goal could make you feel overwhelmed. Break it down into smaller chunks and try again.
  • Is something already bothering you about this goal? Maybe you feel overwhelmed by how much you’ve got to do. Or maybe you feel pressure to succeed. Jot down everything you’re worrying about, then come back to it. Here’s a bit of science about Fear when setting and achieving our goals.

When under too much stress, the body’s natural response to fear may trigger the fight – flight response. When triggered, our bodies release chemicals which cause a burst of energy and strength, raising our heart rate, blood pressure and breathing rate. This primal response to fear or stress is because our bodies can’t tell the difference between real or perceived threats. This may lead responses such as – anxiety attacks (flight), guilt (fight) or procrastination (freeze). The Fight or Flight response occurs when we are overwhelmed by everything we need to do. Want more? Click this link

Setting Goals

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Now you should have some clarity on the goals you need to set. However, this is just a taster of the process that Josie takes you through with her Goal Creator training that you can get FOR FREE! So if you’d like more support then check out what she has to offer you at the end of this post!

  1. Write down the 3 or 4 goals you’ve chosen to focus on. Why have you chosen these? What positive effect will working on these goals have?
  2. Write down the steps you need to achieve each of your goals. Include everything that will accomplish your goals, especially the little things that may seem obvious – they’re important.
  3. Use definite language for each goal – using ‘I will’ instead of ‘I want to’. Using this language helps to set your mindset and believe that you will achieve your goal in 2019!
  4. Go back to each step and set a date that you think is reasonable for completing  that step. This holds you accountable for your actions and keeps you focused.
  5. Write down your goals where you’ll see them daily. Get creative! This ensures you’re thinking of your goals each day and will encourage you to act!
  6. Choose a reward for completing each goal. How will you celebrate? It doesn’t have to be a material reward, you can get your a manicure or have a date night, for example. This might seem silly, but it’s a really important part of the process. Josie has kindly explained the science behind using rewards:

The brain loves rewards. It loves to feel like it’s getting somewhere. So, when we reward ourselves for small actions, we are sending positive brain chemicals around our bodies. The more we do this, the more we create these positive chemicals which encourage us to do more of the things that keep us safe and well. The more we do this we are creating positive reinforcement. So the more positive actions we take, the greater success we will have. This will keep you focused, motivated and feeling good!

In Conclusion 

When you have lots running around your head you can get into a negative cycle of overthinking. Having a busy brain can affect both your physical and mental health! Getting your ideas down on paper will help you to stop worrying about everything.

Then you can work around your strengths and create a positive mindset for goal setting. When you consider your priorities you can create meaningful goals, which can be broken into small, manageable steps. Finally, by rewarding wins, you create a positive cycle which leads to more and more success. Now go and create your awesome goals for 2019, without feeling overwhelmed!

The Goal Creator 

Yay – you’ve found the link to Josie’s FREE Goal Creator training, that’s brand new for 2019! Whether you’ve read all my tips or skimmed your way here; It’s a win!

The Goal Creator workbook and video will help you get clarity of mind by getting things down on paper. You’ll be able to move forwards and take small actionable steps to stop overwhelm and lead you to success.

The Goal Creator Free workbook

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The Impact of Positive Mindset on Taking the Old into the New #NYE2018 #positivemindset #poetry

Here’s my take on using positive mindset strategies to let go of the old in anticipation of the wonderful opportunities ahead. More importantly, I talk about the importance of spending time in the now!

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I hope you can make 2019 the year that you learn to be present and mindful of taking each day at a time. Please enjoy my poem and then spend a little time reading it again to recognise where you could take on 1 New way of looking at a part of your life next year!

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Follow me @Strength Of Tears on Instagram

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